aww, girl...

aww girl, you know you're the ONLY one I wanna spend my fall break with. . .

the thesis project.

notorious.

I've been trying to take a picture of myself every day that I work on my thesis (which is, you know, basically every day). By May, I'm hoping to have a collection of potentially hilarious/pitiful photographs of myself during this journey to Hell and back my foray into publishable thesis-dom. My goal is to document myself exactly as I am that day; unkempt or put together, hair a mess or completely done up, in various locations both on campus and off. So far, I've gotten some really good photographs. . . my favorite is the one above. Look how excited I am! So bright eyed and well-rested! Delighted to plunge book first into the whole damn thing! Wired on a four hour coffee binge!

While the process of writing a thesis isn't exactly the Hellstorm I thought it would be, it's not a cakewalk either. I've logged more hours at the school library than I care to count and the reference desk librarian knows me by name. The familiar buzz of the fluorescent lights on the library's top floor are as good as silence to me now. And I can't get through a morning without a Nalgene full of coffee (don't judge me, it's BPA-free and the only way I can smuggle my liquid gold into the library). I am so grateful for my amazing friends and boyfriend J, who've listened to me drop phrases like 'felt-sense of engenderment' and 'corporeal confines of one's physicality' into conversations about, you know, normal-life stuff. I've plotted out a page in the preface of my thesis -- "Special Thanks to Folks who Provided Unconditional Emotional Support" -- for everyone who's gotten my mind off school, had a beer with me after a long day of research on Freudian sense-of-self or actually listened to what my thesis is concerned with. Ya'll are great. Really and truly.

where I've been.

So.

I suppose I owe you an explanation, don't I?

  

This summer was wonderfully busy, as you can probably tell by my lack of updates. And this fall? It's proving to be even busier than July and August were. I finally started on my thesis (shaping up to be concerned with tomboys, gender neutrality and coming-of-age tales in the American South), settled back into my sunny apartment in my little college town and even got a roommate -- she cooks, she cleans and she makes me laugh when I'm on the verge of tears from all of the reading and writing and analyzing I've done for my thesis.

I guess I should also mention that I PASSED that damn test. I PASSED! REALLY AND TRULY! I only had to analyze Einstein's 'fabric of time' theory in French for two hours and then translate what I'd learned into English without my brain oozing out of my ears or exploding out of my eyes. Grad school is, apparently, VERY SERIOUS BUSINESS. If all goes well with the fracking huge chunk of thesis I'm writing this fall and editing in the spring, I should graduate in May with most of my sanity intact. Unless, you know, the University suddenly realizes I need to pass a doctorate-level calculus course.

Fingers crossed, okay? I'm going to go ahead and cross my toes on this one, too. Just to be safe.

fly that ocean in a silver plane.

It hit me today that I will be in on vacation in a little over one week -- Barcelona, Madrid, Seville & Lisbon, followed by Fez, Tangier and Casablanca. I've never been to Spain or Portugal, though I've dreamt of visiting them both since the last time I traveled abroad. Africa, however, is the place I'm most excited to visit and to check off my list of visited places; truth be told, I get giddy at the prospect of adding another continent to my travel log! One of my good friends will be in Africa as well, studying abroad at a university in Algeria, and I wish we could visit her while we're in that region but there won't be enough time. I can't wait for the food (the falafel! and tabbouleh! be still my heart). And the beautiful scenery, the palaces and the plazas. And the experience, seeing all of those amazing cities with my mother as my sidekick. It's going to be an amazing two weeks and I am pee-my-pants happy in anticipation.

As I sat at work today, filling out work orders and invoices, the duprees' 'you belong to me' came over the radio and I couldn't help but think about this upcoming trip and how much I am going to miss everyone. . . especially Josh. It's such a lovely song and the lyrics were totally speaking about how I felt: the singer croons about the faraway places he's seen and explored, and all the while, he keeps his loved ones in his heart no matter the distance. I always get frustratingly lonely when I travel, from the couple-hour road trips in the car when I visit my boyfriend to the few months I spent studying abroad -- I always need someone I care about close by because traveling doesn't mean quite as much unless you're sharing the sights and the sounds and the memories with someone you love (and someone to hold my hand and pukebag during in-flight turbulence. . . that, too). I wish I could share this experience with everyone I love and I wish I could take everyone I love with me!

Let's all take a trip somewhere, together. Revel in the sights, feel the heartbeat of the cities, pack our gullets with the foreign cuisine. Where do you want to go?


(and that part about the pukebag? totally an exaggeration. . .)